I had a friend who used to insist that she didn’t write her stories–they came to her from somewhere else, and she just wrote them down. She had to figure out the best way, of course, and sometimes she couldn’t catch what she was told (or worse, the stories maybe weren’t trying to get to her) but she didn’t believe she wrote her stories.
I…could go both ways on that, pretty much at the same time. I write my books. I work hard at them. My characters, though–often they do seem to come from somewhere else. It’s always been that way, even when I’ve been scolded for being “fanciful” (and once lectured for not “taking responsibility” for the quality of my story!)
Eighteen years ago I finished my first novel’s first draft. My character Ben was pretty much set from then on–but it’s only in the last few years, in my attempts to deepen the backgrounds of everyone, that I’ve realized Ben is Hindu. I’m researching that now, and it’s amazing how well this ancient religion explains the way Ben has always been. A friend told me I just knew subconsciously back then that he was Hindu and deliberately wrote him that way, but how could that be when I knew NOTHING of Hindu religion then?
Truly. Some of my characters just show up and demand that I write them a book. But that’s normal to me. I’m okay with it. Then along comes a story that must be written THIS way and no way else, and I wonder a little more than usual just where this stuff comes from.
I’m not a fan of fairy tales, but in June I’ll be doing Camp NaNo and guess what? I’ll be working on a re-telling of a fairy tale. It’s erotic fiction (or perhaps erotic romance, or even just romance on the spicy side– the lines are blurry), something I’ve never written before–and it’s got some kink to it which is also pretty new to me. On top of all that, it’s set in a new universe because the Dream’verse and Keeper’verse and Flame’s world and Fidelis’ weren’t enough–apparently I really needed another one.
Traditionally one starts NaNo with a brand-new story, but this one’s been around a while. I got about 8,000 words in last time, then I got stuck because I didn’t know what I was doing.
I tried to change it–forget the fairy tale, I thought, and give it a more familiar structure. Then it will move.
Nope.
I tried to make it about the magic, as I’m (still) not terribly comfortable with romance.
Nope.
I even tried to remove the kink (don’t kill me, those who have read! It didn’t work and the smut is still there as it was!) because it’s not something I really grasp, and doing the research scares me.
Nope.
I don’t get to compromise with this story. To Embrace the Beast will be what it wants to be, or it will not exist. And that makes me wonder where it came from.
I’ll wonder as I’m writing, though, because I’ve just got to know where it’s going.