Gratefulness

Every year I do a post near Thanksgiving about things I’m grateful for. So, let’s do this!

1. Family. Without my family, I wouldn’t be the person I am or doing the things I do. To me, family is forever and everything to me. They make life worth living. They are a comfort in tough times, and those I celebrate good things with. I have the most amazing family, and every year, I give thanks for them and all they are to me. 

2. My job. Those of you who know me and what I do for a living are probably giggling. My job is at best, stressful; at worst, insanity. And this isn’t an exaggeration. It is by far the most demanding, difficult, insane job I’ve ever had. I’ve had people threaten to sue me, cuss me out, treat me like a moron, and threaten to kill me. (For reals). I’ve been at this particular place of employment for almost 15 years.

But.

There are good people, too, like my bosses. They treat me like family and I think they’d do anything for me. The three guys total (including my bosses) I consider family, and I’d do anything for them, too. We just lost one of them just last month, and I took it pretty hard. I’ve had some great times with them. And, this crazy place I work provides the money to keep a roof over my head, food on the table, and clothes on our backs. A nice bonus I got recently allowed me to pay off a big bill I’d been stressing about. So, yeah, I’m grateful for it, no matter how crazy it makes me.

3. Adam Lambert. This guy’s a genius and he’s inspired me SO MUCH. His song “Trespassing” inspired me to self-publish Fey Touched despite the fact that I was terrified. And his music soothes me and helps me get through difficult writing times. And, difficult times, period. I’ve been a fan for 6 years, and when my family found out, they thought I’d lost my mind (I’m a headbanger chick). But. Adam’s music transcends genre, I think. Despite the fact that it’s more pop/dance, I can relate. Most of all, I can appreciate it for his talent singing and lyrics. And when I’m really depressed, pulling up a video of him performing on youtube always makes me feel better. And, he’s hot. More recently, his song “The Light” from his newest album “The Original High” has become my mantra song. Go check it out. I’ll wait.

Amazing, right? And so damn empowering. I had no idea how much I needed it in my life until now.

4. Diagnosis of trigeminal neuralgia (and I still have to look up the spelling!) and the right medication. I’m grateful for being frustrated and angry enough to take my mother-in-law’s advice about being my own advocate to research this stuff on my own. And then being brave and confident enough to present this to my new neurologist, and finally, for getting on the right meds. I am not pain-free by any means, and I still have bad days. However, I am probably 95% pain free. We recently upped my dosage and I’m feeling so much better. I’m not having to endure the awful stabbing pain all day at work, then come home, take a loopy pill, and hope it goes away enough so I can do something. Now that I’m on these meds, not having to do that day after day is my definition of heaven. I am also reopening my darkroom, something I thought I’d never be able to do, thinking the chemical smell and low light would bother my eye. So that’s a possibility again, and it’s about time because I missed it terribly.

5. Darkroom chemicals still being available. Back in 1997, I wrote an article about darkroom being a dying art. Dude, that was almost 20 years ago. A lot of camera stores in my area have given up the ghost, and the ones that still exist are hanging on by a thread. And don’t stock darkroom chemicals and equipment. It’s so sad. I know digital is the thing now, and I love it myself. But, dang, working in a darkroom and developing my own film and making my own prints is where it’s at for me. It’s such an amazing, complex, magical process. And to deprive future generations of photographers of that saddens me deeply. But, technology progresses, and these things happen. I’m just very grateful that I can still get my stuff online. (Or else I’d be screwed). I’m also grateful that it’s so cheap. A lot of photography equipment is expensive, but chemistry is not.

There’s more, obviously, but I think that’s enough.

So this Thanksgiving, I challenge you to think of 5 things – big or small — to be thankful for. It can be anything, like indoor plumbing so you’re not freezing your butt outside in an outhouse, or something like being in remission from cancer. Whatever. And be thankful. Because life sometimes sucks and it’s so damn easy to complain and hate (and I’m guilty of this, too!). And it’s harder to think of what you’re grateful for. But there is at least something to be grateful for. So, think of that. And be happy. Life is not a destination, but a journey. Let’s make it the best yet.