Adulting

At the start of this year, I got back from vacation, looked around at the state of my home, and declared that January would be Adulting Month.

What I had in mind was things like “make some appointments that I keep putting off” and “clear the junk out of my home office”. (I guess decluttering is the new weight loss resolution?) But apparently the universe didn’t get the memo.

I’ve written before about how contra dance has helped me grow. Well, the past few months have presented a whole new challenge. See, I’m on the organizing committee for my local dance community. A few months ago, we started talking about changing how we do things. It’s a bit esoteric and not essential to my point here, so I won’t go into details, but suffice to say that it’s about inclusivity. (If you really want to know, read the fifth paragraph of my last post about contra.)

Here’s where I admit that I was the one who officially got things moving (after months of unofficial talking). Suddenly I found myself on the front lines along with two other women. We were planning out how to introduce it in such a way that everyone felt heard and included, even the people who liked the status quo and had never thought about doing things differently. I was writing copy for our website and newsletter. I was vetting the survey that my co-planner put together. I was talking to other dancers to find out how they felt about the proposed change.

We decided to do a trial event with the change in place. The event coincided with our Annual General Meeting. We knew sentiments were running high and there would be opposition. A heroic amount of planning went into managing that so, again, everyone would get a chance to feel heard. I was still terrified that the community would split apart.

It didn’t. The event was two weeks ago. It went beautifully. We haven’t quite managed to stick the landing yet, but all signs point to the community coming through this intact, through a process of consensus, with mutual respect still in place.

I did that.

I mean, we did that together–my co-planners were equally involved, and the three of us could never have managed it if the community hadn’t been so tight-knit to begin with. But somewhere along the way, I’ve turned into a community leader and I can’t even believe I just typed those words. I’ve leveled up. I don’t even know the limits of my capability anymore, and that’s kind of amazing.

(Four years ago, a friend of mine in that community talked me into attending an event for dance organizers even though I wasn’t one yet. Since then, I’ve run the newsletter for several years, co-wrote a code of conduct and a complaints policy to back it up, and now this. Hmmm. I guess he was right.)

The only drawback? This has taken up all my spare adulting energy for the past month.

Good thing it’s the Lunar New Year today. Adulting on the home front, here I come!