While I was writing a new scene for Grave Touched (the sequel to Fey Touched), one character made an offhand comment to another about “memory therapy.” I haven’t explored that yet, but since Grave Touched is science fantasy and set in a near-future Earth, I’m thinking “memory therapy” could mean erasing bad memories or something along those lines. Since the character being spoken to suffers from PTSD from brainwashing and torture, it would be something to consider…right?
WRONG.
Why, you ask? People who suffer from PTSD suffer from flashbacks, among other things. It would stand to reason that if they no longer remembered the event (s) that caused the PTSD, they’d be better off, right?
WRONG AGAIN.
Why, you ask? Am I a sadist?
Nope, I’m not a sadist. However, I believe that memory is not only beneficial to our lives, but it also makes us who we are.
Don’t believe me?
Here’s an example. I had a terrible thing happen when I was 22. The man I was engaged to left me for my best friend, who’d engineered the entire thing out of jealousy. They ended up getting married. Sounds kind of petty, but at that time, I was totally in love with the guy and I was devastated by what happened. However, going through this made it possible for me to find real love, the kind that doesn’t disappear because of someone’s machinations. It also caused me to be more cautious with my friends and boyfriends. I wrote a lot about it, and I believe I’m a better person for it. But at the time? It SUCKED.
Now, if I’d had those memories removed, would I be the same person? Would I know the things I’d learned from that? Of course not. I’d be doomed to make the same mistakes because I wouldn’t know any different. (Kind of sad, actually. I created some of my best poetry and photography because of what happened…which is another point in the favor of keeping memories, even painful ones).
And finally, personal evolution. All of what makes me is my experiences and my memories. I wouldn’t be the writer I am if I hadn’t lost love, or been made fun of mercilessly; I wouldn’t be me without the knowledge of how to write and take pictures; I wouldn’t be me without the influence of my parents, who raised me well, or even the influence of my in-laws, as they are wonderful, inspiring people. I wouldn’t be able to look at the world the same: through the lens of my own experiences, thoughts, and past.
And that begs an intriguing question: who would I be if it weren’t for these things? I attempt to answer that very question in one of my novels-in-progress, Oubliette. If I’d been a different person, if this or that never happened (or did but I didn’t remember)…the answer is kind of scary, and of course heavily fictionalized, but it is an intriguing idea to explore.
So, if “memory therapy” is ever created, I would say NO WAY. And, for the record, so does my character with PTSD. She’d rather remember, too.
So, leave those neurons alone, please and thank you. They are precious.
Wonderful article. I shared it on FB.